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- Transform The Selling Experience -

Not so thrilled about selling yourself and your services?
Here's how to transform that experience.


Most of us look at selling as an activity. There are certain things you need to do and ask and say to get the sale. Right? Well, only partially right; when you mostly focus on what you have to do, you usually won't do a great job.

This is going to be the first in series of More Clients eZines on selling as a lead-up to my new "UnSales ToolKit" which will guide you through the selling process from the inside out.

The majority of Independent Professionals look at selling as a necessary evil. All kinds of thoughts and emotions come up regarding selling - and most of them are not so positive.

Are any of the following familiar to you?

Selling is manipulative and dishonest.

Selling only results in rejection.

I don't want to bee seen as pushy.

If they really want this service, they'll ask me.

It takes forever for a prospect to say "Yes."

Take a moment and make a note of your dominant belief about selling. It may be a variation on one of the above. But now let's look a little more deeply. It's not just the thought, but everything that goes along with the thought.

Your thought also triggers the following:

Feelings - Inferior, confused, afraid, uncertain, reluctant

Images - Being rejected, being ridiculed, being a failure

Body sensations - Sweating, pounding heart, shallow breathing

Behaviors - Avoidance, nervousness, talking too much

I think it's pretty obvious that if your experience of selling matches some of the above, selling is going to be a struggle for you. Your focus will be on what doesn't work, what you don't like. And you will attract what you put your attention on.

Here's an exercise to shift your experience of selling.

Imagine an activity that you really love doing. You approach it with enthusiasm and excitement. You know you'll do it well. You're eager to engage in this activity and it's very fulfilling.

So pick an activity for you.

It might be a sports activity, spending time with good friends, cooking a meal, or working with your best clients. It doesn't matter, as long as you have very positive associations with that activity.

Now take a look at the experiential elements of this activity:

Thinking - What thoughts do you think about this activity?

Feelings - How do you feel when you do this activity?

Images - What do you see when you anticipate this activity?

Body sensations - What do you feel in your body during this activity?

Behaviors - What exactly are you doing in the course of this activity?

To really get the experience of this, you might want to close your eyes and imagine fully participating in this activity when you enjoyed it the most.

Observe how you are thinking, feeling, picturing, sensing and behaving. Be aware of how much you enjoy this experience. Notice how great it feels. Experience it as deeply as you can.

In the next part you'll transfer the experience of your favorite activity onto the activity of selling. Imagine a selling situation and then map the experience of the favorite activity onto that situation.

Remember - you're creating this; you're making it up. So create it as great as you possibly can. Imagine sitting in front of a prospect, for instance, thinking, feeling, picturing, sensing and acting very much like you do when you're involved in your favorite activity. Really recreate that experience. Make it fun, exciting, engaging and fulfilling.

Did you get into it?

Did you actually start having positive anticipation of enjoying the selling activity? Ultimately you create what you experience. So why not create an experience that is uplifting instead of dispiriting? This is something you can do - a skill you can learn.

OK, now I'd like you to create a metaphor for selling that ties into your favorite activity. In a workshop I led this past week, participants came up with the following metaphors:

Selling is like a party where I've invited all my friends and I get to interact with them in a very personal, authentic way.

Selling is like boating where I'm easily gliding through the water and steering where I want to go with virtually no effort.

Selling is like making a beautiful handmade quilt and then offering it to a good friend.

Selling is like tennis where we play hard but the feeling is one of friendly competition.

Selling is like climbing a mountain. We go up steadily, step-by-step, ultimately reaching the peak.

Selling is like playing jazz. It's a lively interaction that consists of both planned passages and free improvisation.

These images and metaphors will be effective only to the degree that you are able to embody them mentally and emotionally before you engage in a selling activity. Do this exercise (thought, feelings, imagery and metaphor) right before your next sales call.


The More Clients Bottom Line: If you want to feel good about selling, you first need to create the experience of feeling good by adopting a powerful image and metaphor that literally transforms your experience of selling.


The More Clients Blog - Please comment on today's More Clients

Creating Your Ultimate Outcome - A New Audio Program

The very first thing someone wants to know about your business is "What's in it for me?" How you answer that question often determines if they buy your service or not. The answer you want to give is your "Ultimate Outcome."

This 90 minute Audio Program on January 30th is the first in our new monthly "TeleClass Expert Series" which delivers a very specific high-leverage marketing strategy via audio that you can apply immediately to your business.

For the price of an inexpensive business lunch, you'll get proven techniques, ideas, resources, and how-to action plans that will help you attract more clients.

You can attend this as a live TeleClass and/or get the Online Audio. We'll even throw in a complete written transcription. And if you like, you can get a CD of the program as well.

For complete details about the Audio Program "Creating Your Ultimate Outcome," just click on the link below.

For other Audio Programs in our Expert Series click below:


Until next week, all the best,

Robert Middleton

Helping Independent Professionals Attract More Clients

210 Riverside Drive
Boulder Creek, CA 95006

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© 2006 Robert Middleton, All rights reserved. You are free to use material from the More Clients eZine in whole or in part, as long as you include complete attribution, including live web site link. Please also notify me where the material will appear. The attribution should read:

"By Robert Middleton of Action Plan Marketing. Please visit Robert's web site at for additional marketing articles and resources on marketing for professional service businesses."